


When It's You

by TheNameIsErronBlack



Category: No Fandom, Original Work
Genre: F/M, darth vader also shows up, goofy teen-ish romance in space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-23 18:13:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14939334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNameIsErronBlack/pseuds/TheNameIsErronBlack
Summary: Jason, dashingly handsome space pilot and ladies' man, attempts to muster the courage to ask out his adorably snarky co-pilot, Kimberly.





	When It's You

“Hello, good lookin’,” He said in the most sensual tone he could marshal. “So nice to meetcha.”

Okay. That part was done. Jason liked to keep things straightforward with his pickup lines. He appreciated a good pun in the right context, but he found the highest rate of success when he was being honest but restrained. Now all that was left was the act of walking into the adjacent room and saying it again much louder. He wasn’t exactly unfamiliar with the art of hitting on good looking females. In fact, he considered it one of life’s great pleasures, but presently, he found himself completely stymied. Perhaps most shocking of all: the source of his affliction _wasn’t_ the six-five alien princess.

It was all because of Kim Prescott. Or, as he affectionately referred to her, Kimmy.

If he had a type, it was the bombshells and supermodels of his age demographic. The long hair, the gaudy, disgustingly overpriced clothing, the unshakeable swagger and confidence neatly mirroring his own; he aimed high and hit his targets more often than not, but today he found himself incapable of even the most rudimentary of greetings to someone he’d probably wouldn’t consider without seeing her in person. She was short, with an equally short haircut, wore glasses, seemed more like she’d be found in the library on weekends, and mostly utilized pithy, cutting insults when speaking to others. The type that would always cut him down in group projects for his lackadasical attitude.

There was no denying, however, that the girl was...well...

Well, it went beyond her simply being cute. He was a officially a space pilot conscripted in a fight against cosmic horrors threatening all organic life, but he simply couldn’t get his mind off of her. She was utterly captivating.

Having at last confronted his feelings, he made his way to the simulator, or whatever it was supposed to be called. He found Kim tinkering around with a computer terminal while the Princess supervised. The two were obviously attempting to bring the ship back to operation after so many years.

His target’s bespectacled eyes looked up to face him before he properly arrived. “Jason. What’s up?”

His confidence solidified by the fact that she remembered her name, he knew the hour was now. Like a rusty nail hidden in a sandwich, it was time to strike. To let Kim know how he felt and how he took care of business on Earth and elsewhere.

“What’s...up?” He shyly inquired.

“Yeah. What’s going on? Do you need me for something?” She continued. Unbeknownst to the both of them, the Princess listened intently, having taken a keen interest into the exchange.

This was the point in the conversation where he would say something to the effect of ‘I definitely need you for something very important, sweetheart/babe/darling’.

“Nothing.” He at last responded.

She cocked an eyebrow at him. “Nothing?” 

Not wanting to look like a total buffoon, he shook his head and doubled down on his original answer. “Nothing.”

Now she was scrutinizing him, and he felt his face flush. “Well, if you actually need me for something, I’ll most likely be right here with Odonia.”

“Great,” He rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. “Catch you around.” He said as the girls watched him leave.

_Much later..._

Things were going swimmingly; it wasn't every day one ended up an intergalactic super soldier on an alien ship half way across the galaxy preparing the necessary resources to battle a cosmic demigod once trapped in another dimension for thousands of years with the fate of Earth and all life in the universe hanging in the balance.

The first thing on Jason's mind today, however, was breakfast.

Ages ago, Princess Melsera's race had perfected the art of synthesizing an amorphous grey paste which, despite Jason's preconceived notions, was filling and tasted like crushed up bits of blueberry muffins. It made somewhat of a mess given Novalarian's distaste for utensils and napkins, but he readily admitted to enjoying Novalarium quite a bit. Jason threw on his training gear and made his way to the Panopticon of Dining to have a much needed meal.

"Morning, Lehr." Certain as a sunrise, Kimberly Prescott greeted him with her permanent sardonic countenance.

"You are the perpetual ray of sunshine we sorely need, Kimmy." His peripheral vision revealed she had gloves so as to simultaneously eat and work on her laptop. He'd be hesitant to admit it out loud without the threat of a Beretta placed against his spinal column, but he more the occasionally worried about Kim. Her intellect was beyond impressive, but she was constantly working on this or that experiment or project with seemingly no regard for leisure time or her emotional well-being, and that was when she wasn't joining them on life-threatening quests to save the universe. Perhaps it would do them both some good if he proffered his concerns.

"So, what's on the table for todaaaa-" He took his seat across from her, preparing to congratulate himself on the pun, but immediately trailed off once he got a good look at his co-pilot.

His inability to respond earned him a cocked eyebrow and skeptical gaze from Kim. "Are you sick, or something?"

He continued to stare at her, mouth partially agape. Jason had been privy to a multitude of miracles and horrors in his relatively short lifespan, but his razor-sharp wit had been stymied by the profound wonder of the sight before him.

Kim had long hair.

It appeared as if she had discovered the source of Jason's sudden onset muteness. "Oh, the hair, right," She concluded. "I tested some tablets that would allow us to breathe on Novalaria I without our suits, turns out one of the side effects is rapid hair development. Assuming I'm correct, it should only last for the next six hours. I should have the kinks worked out before we get there."

For as long as he'd known her, Kim's auburn hair ended at her ears, presumably for its utilitarian value in combat, but presently it was long and thick, and flowed past her shoulder blades, given that Kim was rather short. It was sort of like in those high school movies; the nerdy, female deuteragonist would take off her turtleneck and glasses, let her hair down, time would crawl to a startling halt, and Third Eye Blind or whatever cheesy pop rock song the budget would permit would begin playing as the main guy finally got it into his head that he should be with her rather than the amoral, sadist cheerleader.

"I'm forced to ask again: are you ill? You're looking at me as if I've sprouted an extraneous limb."

It was only in that moment Jason realized he had been gawking at Kim for the past several seconds. He would have to employ his indelible charm to swiftly mend the proverbial wound.

"You, uh...it looks good on you," That would have to suffice. "But anything looks good on you."

A hand grenade went off in the base of his stomach. There was no identifiable reason for the outburst, but the reality was that he just called her hot and there was a serious possibility that Kim would soon relieve him of one of his extremities. Jason had never been one to fold, whether dealing with women or hostile alien monsters, and he didn't plan on breaking that streak.

"I mean, not that I think you look good or anything like that," He wasn't so much digging a hole as he was being hurled into Eclade's blue-star core. "Because you are passable...speaking objectively, of course. I'm sure there's a science to it, and you'd be at least, like, a six on that scale. Out of ten."

Kim's unchanging expression failed to communicate the effect of his eloquent justification, although Jason figured any further words would only serve to increase the chances of a fatality.

At long last, Kim shattered the silence. "Isn't there a gaggle of cheerleaders you should be hitting on right about now, Lehr?" With that, she returned to her work. Jason, for his part, turned away so as to hopefully mitigate the embarrassment he just experienced. What was wrong with him? Kim was the exact opposite of his type; since when did he ever even think about short-haired, smart, dorky girls who mostly wore gender-neutral clothing and regularly assaulted him with a barrage of acerbic insults? A far more terrifying question was why he was placing such emphasis on the interaction, particularly when these sorts of failures had little effect on his ego, but right now-

“Greetings, friends! Is today not a most great day to be existing?” A new voice sat down in an adjacent seat, that of Princess Melsera. She continued upon making eye contact with Jason. “Jason! Is Kimberly’s hair not the most glorious spectacle your senses have beheld? Earlier, I entreated her to allow me to style it in the manner with which females of my race do, but she vehemently rejected the idea. What is your opinion on the subject? Would she not look even further glamorous and beautiful were I to work my, as the human colloquialism dictates, magic on it?”

Jason felt as if he was going to sink into the floor, and he was left wondering if that would be such a terrible fate. He quickly scurried away before answering the question.

* * *

He recounted the King’s mantra: simply picture the image in your mind's eye, and relax...

There was no mistaking it: this was definitely Kim’s room. wires strewn about every which way, two massive hordes of books and literature, one for those completed and those to be done, and, of course, Kim herself, sitting on her bed, doodling away on her laptop. Her dark, auburn hair lazily falling past her face, that look of laser focus she would have when intent on achieving something important to her, and those adorable glasses that always seemed to be crooked just so…

“And what do you want, Lehr?” Even in what essentially amounted to a dream, she greeted him as if she discovered a fly that refused to exit through the window but she was too apathetic to kill it.

“I’ve been thinking…” Ordinarily, intruding on Kim’s privacy would be something of a nightmare beyond comprehension, but there was no need to feel any sort of mortification at present. It did nothing to mollify his anxiety, but one could only ask for so much.

“Your mother must be so proud.”

“I should take you away from all this pesky work.” He began to slowly close her computer.

Kim’s eyes looked up at him, containing a venomous hatred in their extravagant beauty. “What made you think I wouldn’t slam the door on your fingers?”

“I think we both know what’s been happening’ here, babe; you talk a big game, but you just can’t get enough of me.” He took comfort in the knowledge that even if she tried to murder him, it wouldn’t matter.

The assertion only seemed to intensify Kim’s barely-disguised contempt. “You become more of a pest with each passing day.”

No sense in dancing around formalities; it was time to move in for the killing blow. "The other night, it occurred to me: What's say me and you fly on down to Skillane IV? Whole place is a year-round summer's day at the beach, and I would most certainly love to see you in a-"

“I highly doubt this was what my father intended when he created this device.”

Jason reflexively whipped around to find, to his horror, Princess Melsera, arms crossed. “Princess!” He greeted her with his usual level of decorum. “What, uh, what’s going on?”

“I suppose I should be making the same inquiry.” Her knowing smile only amplified his anxiety.

“I don’t see why I should do such a thing when you’re the one intruding on my privacy. Very un-royal of you.” Satisfied with his rebuttal, he returned a smirk in kind.

“Is this not my father’s creation you are currently using?”

He walked right into that one, but there was no time to back out now. “Before I was so rudely interrupted, I was going to ask Kimmy here if she would help me battle the deadliest villain in the universe.”

“And whom do you seek?”

“Uh...Darth Vader.”

“Is that true, Kimberly?”

She didn’t even bother to look up. “Nope.”

“I see. So you were attempting to manufacture a simulation wherein you could ask your copilot on a date without the danger of repercussions.”

“I-I was not!”

“Seriously, Lehr? That is truly, truly pathetic, even by your standards.”

He pressed his hands to his face in shame. “Terminate simulation,” Reality once again came into view as the simulated world dissipated into the ether and Jason once again found himself in the Duality Commune. 

“Seriously, that was very un-royal like behavior of you, Princess. Privacy is of utmost importance on Earth, you know.” Jason exited the simulation with the princess and a newly acquired sense of shame. Apparently, his mastery of subterfuge needed some work. He planned a hasty retreat to his temporary living quarters, but the Princess insisted on questioning his motivations.

“Perhaps, although I suspect it is also un-royal to utilize a friend’s technological achievement without their permission,” She said in reply. “Although, I am certain my disappointment will be mollified if you inform me as to what you were doing with a simulated version of your compatriot, Miss Prescott.” 

"What I was trying to do, if you must know, was find out what pisses her off." There was at least a modicum of truth in that statement. Attempting to get through to Kim was like trying to destroy a granite octopus with a toffee hammer. Plus, he needed every scrap of ammunition he could get on her. Kim had no reservations about distributing venomous vitriol towards her comrades at regular intervals, but it became readily apparent that she especially reveled in deriding him at every opportunity. 

"If you declare as much, I suppose, but there is nothing wrong with conceding that Kimberly Prescott is not nearly as terrible as you make her out to be."

“No, she is; she is the worst. She constantly takes down my ideas, she laughs whenever I make the smallest mistake, and that...that smug grin of her's fills me with ennui!” He freely admitted to stealing that word from her; it just sounded appropriate. 

Unabated by his interruption, the princess continued. "She is an excellent pilot, a caring, generous friend with a brilliant mind, not to mention exceptionally beautiful..."

“Okay, I get it.”

“Her face is perfectly proportioned, and based on what I have learned about human standards of beauty, she is, as I'm sure you would agree, downright adorable.”

That last comment was enough to shatter his threshold. "Alright! I admit it! She's great! She’s funny, smart, and super pretty!" He lost the ability to make eye contact with the Princess after at last revealing his worst-kept secret. Her ear-to-ear smile made the wound even more acidic, but there was little justification in attempting to deny the truth. “What gave it away?”

"I had formulated a theory, although I could not say for certain until you confirmed my suspicion moments ago. The way your gaze would linger upon her and the manner in which you would consistently brighten in mood upon seeing her, I was all but certain you felt something for her beyond friendship. Not to mention the way your face would constantly inflame in her presence..." 

"Oh jeez..."

"Yes! Precisely in that manner!"

Jason gave a sigh of resignation. “Please don’t tell anyone about my...slip of the tongue.”

“Oh, Jason, of course not! But my commitment to secrecy is contingent on you informing me as to when you will be telling Kimberly of the good news.”

He eyed her skeptically. “What good news?”

“The news that you reciprocate her feelings of romance, of course! I presumed you would feel elated at the discovery of your mutual appreciation for each other’s company.”

Jason grew increasingly worried about the possibility of his feelings being broadcasted to the rest of his comrades. It was true that Princess Melsera was incredibly perceptive, particularly when it came to emotions, but it was also a well-known fact that he was far from a master of the art of subtlety. The possibility that his thinly-disguised affection was the culprit behind Kimberly’s distaste for him burrowed into his heart and made a nest. Making eye contact with the Princess became an increasingly difficult prospect as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I-I can’t. She can barely tolerate my existence.” She told him as much.

The Princess appeared visibly confused. “I do not understand. Are you unaware that Kim holds affection for you which you hold for her in kind?”

"You say that like it’s a fact.”

She gave a soft smile. “Based on my interactions with her, I have deduced she appreciates your company far more than her behavior would tell you. Given your confidence in matters such as these, I find it somewhat unusual that you would willingly shirk a readily available opportunity, particularly with such an outstanding candidate."

His mouth tasted like something metallic. Sure, Jason hit on any female with a pulse, and some technically without one, but he would sooner fight the Great Conqueror Yakoto by himself than even entertain the idea of asking Kim out. Even the act of talking to her was a physically and emotionally exhausting struggle. It was less like walking on a tightrope and more akin to walking on a tightrope suspended two thousand feet above the River Styx while a stern father figure reads aloud a list of your failures or getting into a cab and discovering Stevie Wonder is your driver and the doors are locked. Plus, he didn't know how long this galaxy-saving gig would last. That amount of awkwardness at such a concentrated intensity would, in all probability, be fatal. "It's hard to explain."

"If I may offer some unsolicited advice on the matter, I believe all that is needed to gain Kimberly's favor is honesty. I distinctly remember a scathing invective she regaled with me regarding her distaste for bullshit."        

A small ounce of hope sprouted in his stomach, although Jason was able to plug it up before it became a full on flood. Perhaps there was some truth in the Princess' words. Perhaps he had been going about things the wrong way, and what Kim truly needed was to see a more authentic version of the genuine article. A small smirk found its way onto his face as he concocted a most ingenious scheme.

"You may be right about that."

"I recall a moment with remarkable clarity when Kimberly performed an impression of you. I shall repeat it verbatim," She cleared her throat in preparation for her venture into the thespian arts. "Look at me, I'm Jason!" It was a mostly accurate imitation of his voice. "I'm so handsome! Hey, is that a cute girl over there?"

He smiled. “That sounds exactly like her.”

* * *

 

Despite what his detractors, and Kim, liked to say about him, Jason, to quote Whitman, contained multitudes. Sure, he was an excellent pilot, a crack shot, and alright at basketball, but he was also at least an 8 out of 10. He wasn’t exactly an objective source on this matter, but he had operable eyeballs and the capacity to recognize patterns. Even from a tender age, his physical appearance coupled with his charm and quick wit gave him a pretty damn solid success rate with women. It was true he had never faced down a target like Kim, and there was a distinct possibility that she loathed everything about him, including his family tree, but he was not deterred

He made sure to wait a few extra minutes in his bed; if it was just the two of them, she might pick up on his plan.

“So, the plan is we do a little pest control, and in exchange we get trinkets that should keep Yakoto out of our heads. Not sure it’s worth it given we have to clean all that crap off our gear, but they were pretty adamant about needing our help.” Ji-Yoon offered to her comrades.

"Trust me, it’s worth it. We need every advantage we can get if we’re going up against him. Even discounting his psychic abilities, he’s not to be-” Kim made an attempt to respond before the collective attention to the arrival of Jason.

“What I believe to be morning, everyone,” He set his plate down and scanned the table. There wasn’t a major shift in her expression, but the fact that he was shirtless was definitely on Kim’s radar. “What’s this about keeping Yakoto out of our heads?”

“Princess Melsera brokered a deal with a group Sefulkers. They’ll give our helmets the ability to nullify Yakoto’s psionic influence,” Kim’s gaze returned to her bowl. "He was born with an usual amount of Keptaminika, which is what allows him to influence other organisms on a massive scale. The psionic dampeners will hopefully counterbalance it by normalizing us as the effects take place."

"Oh. Is that why he's a supervillain? I was kinda hoping he found some sorta secret amulet that gave him powers. Or a stone of power locked away for an eternity in the darkness of space. Something."

"Really?" Ji-Yoon asked.

"Yeah. You have Red Masque and Captain Nova and all those other guys with weird powers back home, you think they were all born with chemical imbalances? Don't think so, sister." He was ostensibly focused on Ji-Yoon, but it was worth noting that Kim was still eyeing him ever-so-slightly. He immediately regretted the decision, as she returned to her food when the two accidentally collided.

Several beats of silence whisked by before Princess Melsera shattered the silence. “Kimberly, is Jason’s physique not sufficiently impressive? His skills as a pilot and soldier are unparalleled, his face is properly proportioned and perfectly symmetrical, and, by human standards, his muscles are extremely impressive. Would you not agree he is a most compatible romantic partner?”

Jason didn’t know whether he wanted to kill the Princess or himself more. Although, he acknowledged this was a fate of his own design, a destiny he shared with Victor Frankenstein, to be destroyed by his own foolish machinations.

Now Kim’s eyes were tearing into him, though he couldn’t decipher the emotionless, deadpan look. “Mmm,” She said. “The problem is when he starts talking. Which reminds me I have to do some more research on how to repulse Lindquad hives. Excuse me.” Having finished her meal, Kim rose to her feet and made a swift exit. Jason used his peripheral vision to slyly check her out as she departed.

“You’re fuckin’ fearless, Jason,” Ji-Yoon started snickering once she was certain Kim was not in earshot. “Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”           

“Fearless is slightly generous, but it’s a good choice.” Chris added.

“What do you mean?” He asked, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

“Disguising you being...goofy to show off to Kim. Very clever.”

“I-I was most certainly not! I forgot my shirt and I was too lazy to go back for it!” Jason responded, pointing a finger of fierce accusation at the Princess. “It was her who put that idea in your collective heads!”

The Princess smiled sheepishly. “Forgive me, Jason! I did not mean to reveal your crush on Kimberly to our group, it was, as you say, a slip of the tongue!”

Jason further descended through the concentric circles of the Underworld. Ji-Yoon snorted.

“Jason Lehr has the hots for Kim?” She sarcastically asked. “Hang on, let me go check to make sure the Earth still orbits the Sun and the horrors from beyond the veil of time and space have not overrun the cosmos. Chris, are you at all shocked by this revelation?”

“I have eyes and a brain, so no.” He didn’t look up from his Novalarium.

“Oh, c’mon, I am a master of tactical espionage!” Jason said. Somehow, almost everyone on board was able to deduce his affection for Kim through natural extrapolation. Perhaps in deceiving his enemies, he was remarkable adapt, but in attempting to deceive his allies, he had all the grace and subtlety of a hoard of war elephants with bells on. “There is no way you could’ve figured it out.”

“Let me ask you this: have you ever thought about her before sleep? Even once?” Ji-Yoon asked.

A slight pause in the conversation followed. “What’s that got to do with anything?”

She snickered. “Oof, you’ve got it _bad_ for Kimmy, dude.”

“No, I don’t. You’re just trying to trick me with your entrapment tactics. I think about lots of stuff while I’m lazing around, and me thinking about Kim doesn’t equate to me having a thing for her.”

“Your face lights up whenever you first see her in the morning, you hit on anything that moves but trip over yourself trying to talk to her, you nearly hugged the life out of her when we thought she and Chris were taken hostage by those Duraleton thugs, you were practically drooling over her when she had long hair the other day, and you just admitted to fantasizing about her in bed; I think you _might_ like her just a bit."

“I must agree with Ji-Yoon, Jason. Being in immediate proximity to Kim is a correlative with an increase in your level of happiness, spontaneity, and awkwardness.” The Princess added, still with that sheepish smile you couldn’t stay mad at.

Jason now felt as if his face was going to burst into flame. “Do you think you could, like…talk to her about it? Kinda get a read on how she feels?” One would probably have an easier time breaking into Fort Knox in broad daylight bereft of gear or clothing than having a genuine conversation with Kim.

“I’d be more than happy to, but I think she’ll pick up on it pretty quick; girl’s got a mind like a bear trap. Once she figures out what I’m poking at, she’ll draw the shades like that.” She concluded with a snap of her fingers.

Chris shook his head. “This ship’s turning into Melrose Place.”

_Even later still…_

Under stressful circumstances, Jason found it useful to get away from the troubles. Somehow, an hour of informal meditation seemed to clear his mind and naturally bring the most elegant solution to the forefront of his mind. Luckily for him, there was one section of the ship that provided an excellent view of the cosmos and was completely unoccupied by any armaments of wa- 

"Oh. Hey," He was genuinely surprised to find Kim, flat on her back and gazing at the ceiling with her hands propping up the back of her head, but an even greater revelation was that she had on _headphones_. Kim was actually engaging in a leisurely activity! It was nice to see that she was indeed capable of at least presenting a facsimile of humanity behind all that snark and cynicism. If he was capable of shirking pessimism in this venture, he'd say he just made the first step in uncovering the gooey, squishy center of the beast's coarse exterio- "What, uh, what are you doin' out here? Well, other than checking out the view." This was the only portion of the ship that allowed for an unimpeded view of space. There was something oddly relaxing about staring into the ether and watching various adjacent planets dance in slow motion.  
  
Kim hurriedly put her headphones upon realizing that she had company. “Nothing in particular.”

He felt compelled to ask her what she was listening to, partially to start a conversation and partially to satiate his curiosity, but thought of better of it. Keeping a fair distance between the two of them, Jason placed himself on the floor, stretched out his limbs, and rested his head on his hands as an impromptu pillow. “I just found this place, like, a day ago, and I figured this beat the heck out of staring at the wall all day. How’s your day going?”  
  
She opened her laptop and once again began tapping away. Jason thought it took a few seconds to boot up, but he decided to store intrusive personal questions in the glove compartment. “It’s been going well, but recently it’s gotten significantly more…annoying. I can’t quite put my finger on why.”      
  
He batted away the comment. “Up your nose with a rubber hose, Kimmy. I’m bored, and I need you to fix that."

“Your solution to remedy your indolence is to bother me with your tales of your vacuous exploits?”

“Hey, I resent that. I’m capable of being an intellectual. There’s far more to me than being a super soldier and ladies’ man.” He knew that was true, even if Kim didn’t see much beyond his bravado.

She rolled her eyes. “And what, pray tell, lies in these reputed hidden depths?”

At last, Jason resigned to the fact that he was presently in a corner with little opportunity to escape without some serious intellectual fortitude and quick thinking. He dodged her gaze and finally responded “I don’t…it’s hard to explain."         

“I think I have the intellect necessary to handle it.”

Jason was silent for a moment. Was he prepared to reveal his second greatest secret to Kimberly of all people? The girl who derided his every move and viewed him the same way a cosmic demigod viewed an ant?

He took a deep, bracing breath before at last releasing the floodgates. At this point, he didn’t think anything could drive his reputation with Kim further into the dust than it was already. 

“Shakespeare.” He almost squeaked out.

“What about him?”

“That’s what I like. I like reading Shakespeare.”

Kim looked at him curiously. “When did this come about?”

“When I was eight years old, I was in a school play of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, mostly cuz I was into one of the actresses, and I thought it would get her to notice me. I played the changeling boy, no lines and one scene, but I’d say I was pretty damn good. Of course, I didn’t understand half of the words in the play at the time cuz I was a stupid kid, but I was hooked. I have em’ all saved on my computer back home.”

Kim snickered. “I would pay a lot of money to see you in a Shakespeare play, but I’m not sure what’s so bad about liking him. Having an affinity for reading the most popular author in human history is hardly an exclusive club.”

“In my social circle, it’d be considered a social faux paus to enjoy theater.”

“With your dad being a police captain?”

“Yeah-hey, how did you know that?”

He was beginning to find that smirk of hers somewhat endearing. “I know everything.”

“I always knew you had psychic powers. It’s the only way you could store all those insults.”

“Actually, Princess Melsera told me. She said something to the effect of ‘Jason’s father is what is known as a captain of the organization designed to deter crime on one of Earth’s major cities’.” It was a startlingly accurate replication of the Princess’ voice which made Jason laugh.

“Did you ask her about me?”

She stopped typing for a moment. “I asked her for info on all of you. I find it best to know everything about someone if I trust them with my life. Ji-Yoon was born in Seoul. What’s your favorite Shakespeare play?”

A small grain of hope’s all-too-brief existence was quietly crushed. “Probably King Lear. It’s super upsetting, but so well written.” 

Kim looked up from her laptop and raised her palm to the ceiling. “When we are born, we cry that we are come to this stage of fools.” She did her best impression of an elderly fifteenth-century British man. Kim’s ability to imitate voices was extremely amusing.

“I also happen to think The Two Noble Kinsmen is pretty underrated.” 

Kim considered it for a moment. “I’m not especially familiar with that one. Remind me.”

“Well, you have this chick, the jailer’s daughter, and she has the hots for Palamon, but he doesn’t even know she exists, even after she freakin’ frees him from prison. And then, she ends up going insane because of the guy!” There was an air of frustration in his tone, which he hastily reeled in. “I feel like that sometimes, with the genders reversed, of course.”

She was squinting slightly as he furtively stole a glance with her in an attempt to discern the effect his slip-of-the-tongue had on her. “What do you mean?” She asked. 

He completely turned away, too afraid to make eye contact with her once again. “Kim, can I ask you something?”

More awkward silence.

“Do you hate me?”

“I don’t understand. Have I given the impression that I hate you?”

He shrugged. “Kinda? It’s hard to tell sometimes,” Typically, Jason had a pretty good radar for determining how much someone hated him; girls usually told him to get fucked and guys usually tried to kill him. Trying to get a beat on Kim was like attempting to decipher an Old English play while a hairy European man tried to get busy on you with a long-sword. “Not to mention I do and say a lot of things that... _incur_ your hatred.” He concluded with a sheepish smile.

She sighed. “No, Lehr, I don’t hate you. You’re persistently compelled to annoy me at every conceivable opportunity, and you hit on everything and everyone, but I don’t hate you. You’re an effective pilot, a good partner, and…” It was clear as a summer’s day that Kim was going to add something at the end there, but she ultimately refrained. “The Melseras see something in you most people clearly don’t.” That was the closest thing to a compliment he would ever get from Kim, so he grabbed onto it for dear life.

Even better, she was insulting him again, meaning they were totally cool.

“Can I ask you something else?”

“Not like saying no would stop you, anyway.”

He smiled, savoring the subtle digs at his expense. This was entering uncharted territory, but Jason considered himself a bold guy. “What music are you into? I see you on that thing all the time, and I gotta know what’s on there.” Plus, Kim seemed like the type of person who would be a total patrician of the fine arts.

“Firstly, it’s called an Ipod, Professor Eyesight, and second, it’s mostly made up of classical music. I’m not as pretentious as I sound.”

Not a particularly earth-shattering revelation, considering her intellect. “Hey, nothing wrong with that. Who’s your favorite, uh, guy who makes that sorta music?”

“My favorite _composer_ would be Johann Sebastian Bach.”

Jason made a mental note to look into the music of Johann Sebastian Bach upon his return to Earth.

“To answer your next question, my grandmother gave me her harpsichord for my seventh birthday. I ended up listening to a lot of classical artists, then it became a tool to help me focus while working, then it became a recreational activity.” The universe came to a startling halt as Kim extended the Ipod to him.

Perhaps the universe just outside the window continued unabated, the ship was just rounding Rannoch B, but Jason’s universe was quietly and wonderfully collapsing in on itself. More secretive than the guards at Buckingham Palace on a walking tour of Fort Knox, Kim was offering a brief glimpse into herself. Gripping the device with infinite care, the text at the top of the screen displaying _Classical Playlist_. A series of names followed, some Jason recognized, the overwhelming majority of which he predicted he could not pronounce properly. Spurred on by Kim, he scrolled through to find Johann Sebastian Bach and decided on the first of his songs. A piano from another point in the universe began to gently caress the senses.

A certain amount of silence passed as Bach continued his genius before Kim said:“Goldberg Variations, _Bach-Werke-Verzeichnis_ _nine-eight-eight_. Not a bad pick.”

He continued to scroll through briefly. “Alright, quiz time, Kim. I’m gonna play a song, you have to tell me the composer and the year it was made. If I win, you have to play a song for me on you harp.”

She grinned slightly. “Harpsichord, and that’s assuming we live that long. What do I get when I win?”

“That’s up to you, I suppose. Oh, and you have to take one of those pills that makes your hair grow out. _And_ you have to wear a super girly dress.”

The final stipulation earned a strange look from his compatriot; she almost looked like she was smiling “Why, exactly?”

Probably should’ve expected that one. “Well, uh, because, uh, it’d be super embarrassing. Because you don’t like to dress, ya’ know...girly.”

She eyed him skeptically, smirking. “If you say so.”

Jason felt as if his face was going to burst into flame at any moment. His peripheral vision indicated that Kim was still anticipating some sort of explanation, but the words “because I think you look like a supermodel” were obviously less than ideal. Had to focus on something else, like the idea of pressing his hand to the back of Kim’s head and closing the distance between the two of them to at last get a taste of that perfect mou-

“Kimberly, I have a most fascinating development regarding the Plasmorphium crystals!” The two whipped around at the source of the disturbance to find that Princess Melsera. Once she realized exactly what she had intruded upon, she was overwhelmed with embarrassment. “Oh, do forgive me,” She squeaked out. “Think nothing of my request.” With that, she was gone. Jason turned back to Kimberly, the color partially drained from her face.

“I’m gonna get some Novalarium,” He stood, lightly rubbing the back of his neck. “You, uh, gotta go get the thingy for the Princess?”

 “Yeah,” She emphatically responded as she slammed her laptop shut. “I’ll see you around.” A few moments later, she was through the adjacent exit and out of his sight.

For fear that his heart might tear itself from his chest in the name of self-preservation, Jason resigned himself to his living quarter-

"Oooh, Jassoon!" The Princess singsonged, merrily intercepting him as he sulked out of the room with the hope of putting as much distance between him and his failure as possible.

"What's up?" He asked, trying desperately to prevent

"It is my understanding that tone of cadence is to indicate the imminent reveal of a surprise. Are you unexcited by the prospect of my surprises?"  

Based on her current track record, that was something resembling the truth, but he couldn't fault the Princess for a legitimate error and he couldn't say for certain if he was having 'a moment' with Kim. "You're a mystery and a half, Princess."

She made no attempt to conceal her excitement. "Come with me!"

* * *

With the unbridled energy of a starving wolf having discovered a barbecue, the Princess left Jason in the Psionic Simulator as she horridly retrieved "something of great significance". The machinery gave off a low hum as it stood by for operation that made Jason feel like someone was about to start figuratively poking around in his head, like an x-ray machine at an almost abandoned hospital. Whatever the Princess had in mind, it filled Jason with a fluctuating degree of dread, particularly now that she was in on his greatest secret. He trusted her with his life, like any of his comrades, but he couldn't trust her to secrecy, at least not completely.

An even greater uncertainty was his current status with Kim. While he didn't expect her to hurl herself at him with reckless abandon and confess her feelings or anything of that degree, there was no denying they certainly had a pleasant conversation. Relative to all their prior conversations, it was a momentous development. He pulled from somewhere deep within himself, revealed something which he considered dangerous, patently bizarre, and she accept-

Voices from beyond, and Princess Melsera was back with Kim in tow. It took a great deal of effort on Jason's part to keep himself planted in his chair.

"Hey there." He weakly offered to the two.

Kim appeared just as befuddled by the surprise. "Hey."

"As I was explaining to Kimberly moments prior, the acquisition of the Plasmorphium crystals has allowed us to amplify the capabilities our Psionic Simulator. Now, we are no longer limited to one individual at a time; upwards of ten minds can operate it concurrently at no personal risk!"

Like a political talk show comprised entirely of dolphins, things were beginning to click together. Things had gone from bad to worse, certainly, but they were about to enter a phylum unquantifiable by human science.

"And I desire the two of you to test its newfound abilities!"

Perhaps, there was a time when Jason would happily agree to such an offer with some sort of snarky rejoinder about the two of them being sequestered but right now the idea of spending a great deal of time alone with Kim provoked in him something far more profound than terror. He looked at her in an attempt to gain a barometer of her assessment of the situation, and found nothing.

"Uh, you know what, I'd love to, but I am gonna hit the hay. You know, back in the day, people on Earth used to sleep on straw sheets, and they'd have to hit it to get comfortable-"

"Oh, Jason, I insist! I can think of no greater candidates than the two of you!" Princess Melsera responded.

"Sure. Let's do it." Kim shrugged, taking the seat across from Jason.

"Excellent!" The Princess exclaimed before either could speak. "However, one of you must conjure the scenario, for you may now create any you desire."

Yet again, there was that smirk, although, in an unanticipated turn of events, Jason was pleased to see it. "I'm gonna defer to Lehr today; I'm curious to see what's knocking around in that head of his."

* * *

"This. Is. _Amazing._ ”

He marveled at the interior, eyes wide and mouth agape. The crisp black-on-white padding of the walls, a multitude of switches, buttons, and lights surrounding the pilot seats, and the complimentary stationary chairs for passengers, it was an exact replication of what his mind had always dreamed of one day piloting.

“What is this?”

Jason’s proximity to self-actualization was cut tragically short by the voice of his comrade, scoping out her surroundings without the look of undiluted wonder.

“Are you freaking kidding me? We are in the _Millennium freakin’ Falcon!_ The coolest spaceship ever!” He nimbly hopped over the armrest and began tuning the ship as protocol dictated, a gesture that served nothing but Jason’s enjoyment, while Kimberly took the seat beside him, smirking at his child-like joviality.

“Didn’t take you for the science fiction, _Star Wars_ type.” Kim remarked.

“Are you kidding? Harrison Ford got me into acting.”

As Jason concluded, his gaze was drawn forward by a great rumbling in the ship’s interior and the thunderous scream created by the narrow pass of an enemy ship that vaguely resembled two bowling balls jammed between a pair of bent parenthesis. His unmitigated glee only magnified.

“Is that another reference?”

 Jason looked at her incredulously. “That’s Darth Vader’s custom Tie fighter! I’d expect you of all people to know about _Star Wars,_ science geek _.”_

Kim rolled her eyes good-naturedly. “I suppose this is the price I pay for letting you take over the operation.”

_“That is a far deeper price you have yet to play, my child.”_ A disembodied but deeply menacing voice spoke to both pilots from beyond the ether.

“Yakoto?” Jason asked, glancing around as if it would help him detect where the threat was located.

_“You are more perceptive than you appear, Jason John Lehr, but not enough to best me. As I anticipated, that foolish Princess secured the Plasmorphium Crystals and used them to power her contraption.”_

“You’re still trapped in Isolation. How are you talking to us?” Kim asked.

_“I know and am capable of a great many things, Kimberly Kate Prescott. I’m afraid you will never learn the secret of my power, for this place will soon become your tomb.”_

“Terminate simulation,” Jason said before the Monster could finish. When no change occurred, he tried again. “Terminate simulation!”

A mirthless chuckle and he spoke again. _“Those words no longer have any meaning here. You two will die, and your minds will remain trapped forever between realities. Your friends will soon share the same fate, as will the Princess.”_

Whatever could be extrapolated but the vague threat had to wait, as the two were rocked by the sudden impact of laser fire directly overhead as Darth Vader whizzed by once again and the two nearly plummeted out of their chairs. After securing their composure, Jason and Kim shared one final glance, instinctively communicating that the other knew what to do.

“Does this thing have any weapons?” Kim asked.

Jason boosted himself out and took off. “Main guns are to your right, I’m on the secondary gunner!”

* * *

Trying to land a shot on Vader’s ship was like trying to capture an eel slathered in butter or, perhaps more aptly, finding a specific needle in a needle stack. Kimberly was an excellent pilot, and Jason an exceptional gunner, but the smaller size and greater speed of the enemy ship made the duel a difficult one, not to mention the incredible skills of its pilot.

“Did you have to make this guy a maestro? He’s ridiculous!” Jason heard his co-pilot frantically ask him over the intercom.

“Vader is the best star fighter pilot in the galaxy!” He rebuked her as he continued to fire on the hostile craft, every shot going wide. In response, Vader reversed his trajectory and, flying upside down, managed to land another burst of laser fire on the Falcon. The ship struggled forward as the two began to regain their composure.

_“A crude but astute observation, child,”_ Vader’s equally menacing baritone boomed over the comms. _“You are both doomed.”_

“Screw you!” Kim yelled back.

" _You may still plea for mercy, child.”_

Fear gripped Jason’s core as his hands once again found the gun’s controls, struggling mightily  to muster his usual steel grip.  There was a terrible ringing in his ears he quickly discovered to be the ship’s various critical system failures making their presence known. He also discovered, much to his dread, that the secondary gun abandoned him in his hour of greatest need; no doubt a stiff breeze would knock whatever life the ship had left out of it. One didn’t need an intimate understanding of _Star Wars_ to fully contemplate Vader’s unrivaled skill as a pilot, and Jason’s mind must’ve made him almost prescient in his knowledge of their tactics. With his rapidly dwindling supply of energy, Jason returned to Kim in the main deck.

“Anakin!” He bellowed Vader’s true nomenclature into the ether, hoping it would get to him. “Anakin, listen to me!”

_"Mockery only hastens your en-”_

“Anakin, you don’t have to kill us! I know you’re just as afraid as we are!” Kim shared his look of desperation and confusion at the proverbial Hail Mary.

 " _D_ _o not concern yourself with what you do not understand.”_

Jason knew that was the signal to move forward. “You’re afraid of the Emperor, you’re afraid of the Dark Side, you’re afraid you’ll never be free to have what you really want,” The only sound was his  panting as he searched for the correct words. “If you let fear control you, you’ll have to kill your children and...and I know you don’t want that!” It was delivered with his usual level of passion and eloquence. “If you kill us here, now, you’ll never get what you want. Because you’re gonna let fear control you forever.”

The ship passed overhead one more time before the simulation dissipated.

____________________________________________

“I once again apologize dearly, my companions,” The Princess made yet another desperate plea for Jason and Kim’s forgiveness. Unbeknownst to any of them, Yakoto had somehow managed to take control of the simulator thanks to the inclusion of the Melsera’s crystals. Thankfully, the problem was quickly patched up by her father’s psychic powers, and they were free to use it without fear once again. Nevertheless, Odonia insisted on escorting Jason and Kim to the medbay despite their lack of physical injury. In its present state, they were relegated to sitting across one another on the massive pad. “Can you find it in your hearts to forgive me for my ineptitude?”

“It’s fine, Odonia,” Kim made yet another vain attempt at quelling her despair. “Really. We completely forgive you.”

Jason shook his head and put on his best facetious scowl. “You know what? I don’t,” Kim shot him a look, and he remembered sarcasm was a foreign concept in her culture. “Sorry, bad joke.”

Odonia’s utter mortification gave way to a tiny, shy smile. “It seems I still fail to understand human customs,” She said as she secured both pilots in a hug with her terrific steel grip. “However, I am most grateful to have friends such as you.”

“We love ya, Princess.” Jason choked out before taking a greedy gasp of air upon release.

Odonia then placed her open palm next to her ear. “What is that, father? I shall be with you momentarily!” She shouted before facing the two one last time. “I request your excuse, for my father requests my presence.”

Now alone with the object of his affection, Jason took it upon himself to utilize his newfound bravery. Kim was smirking slightly, so she likely didn’t want him dead.

“Your middle name is Kate?”

“Kate was my grandmother’s name.”

“The one that gave you the harpsichord?”

“The very same. Is there a relative of yours named John?”

He nodded. “My dear ol’ dad.”

The two once again slipped into a moderately uncomfortable silence.

“Kim, can I ask you something? Again? Like, after this initial question?” It seemed nothing could truly shake his painful awkwardness around her, but he began to accept that it was something he would have to abide by, for the time being.       

That earned him a slight chuckle. “I don’t think there’s anything I can do avoid it, so fire away.”

He gave a final sigh, resigned to his fate. No more tap dancing around the issue, the time to fire the trebuchet was now. He shifted his body slightly in order to completely face her.

“Do you wanna, like, hang out sometime?” It occurred to him after he said there might be some ambiguity to the request, and he was through with relying on half-measures. “I don’t mean hang out in the way we’ve been doing, I mean boyfriend-girlfriend, holding hands, making out, that sort of thing.” Not the most eloquent proposal, but it was very much in line with his style.

Although still attempting to maintain her facade, Kimberly appeared more than slightly taken aback by the idea. “So, you mean a date?” She hesitantly asked, her smirk growing wider.

“Yes,” Jason said. “A date. Absolutely.”

It blossomed into a full on grin as she began to tentatively nod. “I think I’d be up for it. On the condition that, because you almost got us both killed, you perform a Shakespearean monologue for me. Got it?”

He smiled sheepishly. “Got it.”

In the many hypothetical instances wherein Jason asked Kim out, he imagined it would go something like attempting to steal a freshly caught fish from the mouth of a starving bear. Given that his supply of luck was clearly not totally exhausted, he mused on the possibility of taking things a Olympian leap further and asking Kim if he could ki-

“I am elated!” A disembodied voice revealed to be the newly returned Princess Melsera bellowed to the galaxy. “At last, the joyous coupling of Jason and Kimberly may commence!” Kim burst out laughing while Jason felt like his face was going to spontaneously combust. “For you see, my friends, I was merely being sarcastic when I said my father needed me. I was far too invested in your inevitable collision to avoid its conclusion.” Odonia proudly declared. “My father and the rest of your comrades will most certainly be pleased to hear of this wondrous development!”


End file.
